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George W. Bush and Nucular

Let me first preface this by saying that I don’t consider myself a political person. In a nation split down the middle of people who blindly submit their loyalties to red or blue, I’d probably be somewhere in the area of a dark purple approaching black, or perhaps a pale lavender nearly faded to white, depending on which color system you’re using. I personally find myself disgusted by both the red or blue sides on any given day. (You know who you are.) I point this out to emphasize that anything I say will never have a hidden agenda favoring a certain political party.

That said,

Is anybody going to tell our President how to correctly pronounce ‘nuclear’? My god. In a time when nuclear arms are arguably the most important topic of discussion on the planet, you’d think the skipper of the biggest boat would at least figure out how to pronounce the goddam word. And to those who defend him and others by virtue of the metathesis argument, I disagree. I wouldn’t consider nucular a result of metathesis any more than I would ain’t, orientate, or irregardless. These types of words are results of sadly common linguistic errors, and have nothing to do with intelligently arbitrary syllabatic transposition. Besides, you probably don’t believe in the serial comma anyway.

In fairness, I should point out that he’s not alone. At least two other presidents have done the same thing, namely Clinton and Carter. But since we only have one president at a time, it’s Junior’s problem right now. Lucky guy.

Hey Mr. President, it’s nuclear. Not nucular. NUCLEAR. Say it with me:


It is not, as you say:


It’s nuclear.

What seems to be the confusion? The word nuclear comes from the word nucleus. Not nuculus. Nucleus.


1. nucular (nuclear)
2. tuburcleosis (tuburculosis)
3. particlear (particular)
4. spectaclear (spectacular)
5. simular (similar)
6. circlear (circular)
7. immacleate (immaculate)
8. singlear (singular)
9. cellear (cellular)
10. Caliglua (Caligula)

*Runner-up: Draclua (Dracula). Should make the Top Ten this month.

Say what you want about his politics. I’d just like to get somebody in there who doesn’t sound like he has his thumb up his ass when he talks. That’d be a start, anyway.

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