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Dunked in pig’s blood

In the wake of the announcement of the killing of Osama bin Laden, it seems people are at odds on a few things. The two ends of the spectrum being:

1. People who praise the execution, regarding it as a justified reason for celebration. They’re parading in the streets, chanting “USA! USA!”, supporting the President’s tactical decision as well as the message from CIA Director Leon Panetta that calls the execution “justice done”.

2. People who take offense to said celebration for various reasons. There are those who understandably feel uneasy about the whole topic of engaging with the enemy on any level; they see bin Laden’s killing as a reason to fear more retaliation, and argue that sacking the enemy’s self-professed quarterback may have opened up another can of worms. There are others who take issue with killing in general — even that of mass murderers with active agendas.

And then there are lots of us somewhere in the middle.

Regardless of these differences, it seems there’s one obvious thing that nobody’s arguing about: TERRORISM IS BAD. It must be stopped, or, at the very least, discouraged.

Here’s an idea:

From what I understand, the acts of the people behind 9/11 were driven by religious fervor. It’s not really much more complicated than that, and it’d be a waste of time to try to empathize with their intentions. In their eyes, the United States is The Great Satan, and it is their duty to kill The Great Satan. They are willing to strap bombs to their backs and pilot airplanes into our buildings, committing suicide in the name of their cause.

But such a suicide would not be just to prove a point. These martyrs have bigger dreams than simply going out with a bang. There’s an incentive: they believe that, as martyrs, they will earn their way into their version of Heaven. You know, the whole thousands of virgins thing.

With Heaven being their ultimate goal, and dying in the name of killing The Great Satan will supposedly earn them a ticket to Heaven, there aren’t many things in this physical world that could deter them from doing anything they can to fulfill their perceived duty. They are not deterred by threats of death. They couldn’t care less about imprisonment. And learning that The Great Satan has executed their leader isn’t going to change their way of thinking.

So I wonder, and I’m serious:

What if we punished them by keeping them from getting into Heaven? It’s not as far-fetched as it sounds. Their twisted system of thought includes a belief that a body will not be permitted into Heaven if it makes contact with the blood of pigs. (Unverified.)

Imagine you were a Muslim terrorist, and in the name of killing The Great Satan, you were willing to be a martyr on a suicide mission with the promise of getting into Heaven and having an endless supply of virgins at your disposal. (Why they wouldn’t prefer an endless supply of sluts would be another blog post.) If you also believed that pig’s blood trumps any chance of getting into Heaven, what would be going through your mind if your leader were captured by The Great Satan and dunked in pig’s blood on a live webcam?

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